plastic heart with emotions

I am often asked this question "Why are you going back to Nepal again, haven't you been there last December?" I haven't found the perfect personal answer to this question. But in the next few weeks, I shall attempt to capture the meaning of Nepal, its people, Project Namaste, Namaste VI team and all the things that make up my very own Namaste Experience. I will probably not do the entire experience justice with my poor writing skills, but this is such a huge part of my life that I do not want to forget, and will never let go of.

So let's start from the very beginning shall we? Truth be told, I wasn't quite sure of my decision to apply to be one of  Namaste VI's leader during or after Namaste V. It has never crossed my mind that I'd be going to Nepal more than once in my life, much less thrice in a year. I always had the idea that the project would slowly fade away, the burning passion and friendships will slip away as we are back in Singapore to face the realities and responsibilities of our individual lives. Boy, I was wrong. My interest in Nepal, its people, and the project itself grew as the days went by. Admittedly, the burning passion ceased to burn, but it has a constant presence in my thoughts. When the time came, I knew I was ready for something different and bigger in my life.

When the names of my fellow Namastees who were interested in leading came up, I was happy. I knew that no matter what, the project would be in good hands. Most importantly, I was happy that we are going to continue to touch the lives of the Nepalese, that our support and presence would not cease. I was excited, not quite sure of the future direction of Namaste. I want to explore, I want to experience. Yet at the same time, I know that education is something I continue to believe in, as long as it's done in the 'right' way. It is with trepidation that we delivered our 'speeches' to our fellow Namastees and leaders, but it is with joy and genuine happiness that I stand before them.

I thank God for the opportunity to eventually lead Project Namaste VI together with 3 very passionate and critical individuals. It was with these 3 people that I spent a good one year with. Exploring new initiatives, facing road blocks and even arguments which we somehow resolved through much heated debate and rationalisations, talking about anything and everything under the sun, sharing our dreams and fears. We may hold uniquely different dreams about the Project, but we shared a common goal of wanting to help the Nepalese. It is with this love for the people that we embark on the year long journey hand in hand.

I could remember the very first meeting we had where we talked about what constituted our Namaste experience. This formed the basis of the project and what we wanted our team to experience. On hindsight, every Namaste has a different experience. We could create or even replicate the same from year to year, but that would not be fair to the Namastees. Even members within the same project would have a different Namaste experience. Looking back, this was what we wanted, it was good. Even with a young history of 5 years, we should not and did not have to live in the shadows of our predecessors. It was up to us to create something brand new.



Man, I was glad to be on this journey with Vanessa, David and Zhirong. (: <3 So back to the question, why Nepal? My simple answer of "Because of its people and the people I am working with" holds so much stories behind it. Would you sit down and hear me out? (:

Remember that. (:

Got to learn to let go and let live.

Will always be a part of me.

I would rather wear honest tears
than the most beautiful and elaborately faked smiles. - Tyler Knott Gregson


Maybe you will never know the real reasons for my tears that day, maybe I will never ever show you the letters.


But I'm running out of reasons.


Need to do 10 so much.


Prove it.


Took chances, experienced, failed, learnt.
Cant trust anymore, lost pieces, less of who I am.
I'm Ok.

This is a very self-indulgent and self-amusing post. So please skip if you are not bored.

Last month, with the help of my uncle who came back from US for awhile, I landed my hands on a new toy. Guess what it is...



Hmm...what can be in here??


Strings and foam...? Play things for a pet?



Neh neh, a box within a box.


Any ideas yet?


yes! my very own kitchen aid mixer!


colour true to this pic.

I've yet to get started on using this, but hopefully I get to soon. Need to buy the transformer. Cant wait to bake bake bake my heart out. (:

Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgement that courage is more important than fear.

From choops, my dearest friend. Thank you. <3

16 June 2011

A pretty awesome chillax day spent in town, got to meet unexpected people. All was good, till the mac crashed and had to go back to school to get electricity.




Large Hazelnut Latte to last the afternoon of work.